Me: Well, after three years, you finally got me to wear your ring. I'm yours and I only had to take two Valium to get through it all. You didn't even notice that I had the word "obey" removed from our vows
W4D: Yeah, I thought your eyes were a little ummm... dilated. :::shrug::: Obey? No need to obey, my little mo chuisle! (W4D always pronounced it "muh kush-lah") You are my wifey now, all mine! Look how happy you have made me!
Me: See me smiling? I am happy, too! That is one wild head of hair you have there, Mr. Man. Glad you got a haircut for our special day. I really dig your white and beige, plaid Pierre Cardin suit. I am so lucky to marry such a snappy dresser.
W4D: No, I am the lucky one. You are one groovy chickadee. I can fit my hands completely around your tiny waist and you look just like that actress on Green Acres.
Me: Nothing will ever change. We will always be young and skinny and happy.
W4D: Let's drink more champagne.
Me: Okay, I think my Valium is wearing off.
One out of three isn't so bad.