Wednesday, September 14, 2005
Do you remember the line from the 1973 sci-fi classic film Soylent Green where Charlton Heston realizes what's going on and screams, "Soylent Green is people!"
I have discovered what constitutes comfort food in my house. "Comfort food is carbs!" Specifically: mashed potatoes with lots of butter or gravy, escalloped potatoes, mac and cheese and carb-laden pasta.
I never cook the evening after I have been traumatized by anything dental. I do however love to shop while under the influence of Xanax so I always cruise a few stores and drop by the bookstore. Unfortunately due to the drugs, I am never able to remember the titles of the books I am wanting to read so I mostly browse and enjoy the ambiance. The bookstore nearest my periodontist is a small, independent one and they have cute gifts like pottery, hand crafts, lovely stationary, fragrant potpourri, incense and great chocolates. After having someone's fingers in my mouth, I always like to reward myself by eating chocolate.
After I left the bookstore and started savoring my hord of dark chocolate and pecan pralines, I drove to the market where I loaded up on healthier fare like shrimp and snow crabs and steaks, fresh veggies and fruit, and I will admit, more chocolate. For supper, I picked up some fresh cheese ravioli and some vodka sauce, ::::gasp:::: in a jar. Nope, I do not cook after anything dental. I have been traumatized and I must recline on the sofa after such an ordeal, not cook. However, I did boil the ravioli and heat the sauce and I even sprinkled it with some fresh basil from garden and made a salad but that is not cooking - that is just plating pre-made stuff.
I thought it was an okay dinner but spoiled Mr. W4D turned up his nose. When I asked him what he thought of it, he stammered and said he guessed it was okay as he pushed it around his plate.
"What's wrong with it?" I asked.
"It's not very tomato-ey and I can't taste the vodka."
"Of course you can't taste the vodka. You aren't supposed to taste the vodka. You taste the tomatoes and cream and the spices and the olive oil. Vodka doesn't have any taste and besides, the alcohol evaporates during cooking."
"It tastes too mild and it's not dark red like tomatoes should be."
Restraining myself, I did not whisk the plate away from the complainer. Instead, I plotted how I will serve him a can of Chef-Boy-Ar-Dee ravioli next time I go to the dentist. He can heat it himself.