Overheard near the grill at a cookout.
The middle-aged lady was accusing her spouse of renegging on a long-standing promise to relocate to another state and a totally different lifestyle.
She: I can't bear the thought of another summer here. I want to move to North Carolina. You promised me that if I married you, we would move to North Carolina.
He: And we shall my lovely, we will live there one day, I promise.
She: You sorry ass liar! I don't believe a word of it. You are a lying sack o'shit. What the phuk do you think I am, stupid? You've been promising that for 35 years.
He: "Whoa, do I detect a bit of negativity in your tone of voice, my dear?"