Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Shake Gently

Must make time to learn about this blogging stuff. But, it's such a busy time of year to say nothing of having Spring Fever and not wanting to be tied down at the computer. To make it worse, we haven't even started our taxes yet. I guess I should load up TurboTax tonight but damn, I hate thinking about taxes. Taxes and lawyers are two things that I wish I could avoid. Speaking of lawyers...

Two alligators were sitting at the side of the swamp.
The smaller one turned to the bigger one and said, "I
cain't unnerstand how you kin be so much bigger 'n me.
We're the same age, we was the same size as
kids..I just don't get it."

"Well," said the big 'gator, "What you been eatin'

"Lawyers, same as you," replied the small 'gator.

"Hmm. Well, where do y'all catch 'em?"

"Down at 'tother side of the swamp near the parkin'
lot of that law firm."

"Same here. Hmm. How do you catch 'em?"

"Well, I crawls up under one of them Lexus and wait
fer someone to unlock the door. Then I jump out, grab
'em on the leg, shake the shit out of 'em,and eat

"Ah!" says the big alligator, "I think I see your
problem. You ain't gettin' any real nourishment. See,
by the time you get done shakin' the shit out of a
lawyer, there ain't nothin' left but lips and a

hungry gator
Did I mention this is Gator Country?
GO Gators!

Craving a big juicy burger so here I go, out on the side deck to sip a bourbon, inhale the heady fragrance of the orange blossoms and toss a couple o'hunks of ground cholesterol onto the grill. The sunset is brilliantly orange and blue and all is right with the world.


Annie P. said...

My daughter is in law school and I find this lawyer joke quite offensive. Nah, I actually find it QUITE hysterical! Keep 'em comin'!

Flaurella said...

Delighted that I can still offend gentle wimmen! But, seriously... I am sure your darlin' pre-law daughter is not yet full of shit and if a Gator shook her, nothing would come out at this juncture. Nope, nothing! Whew! I am such a smoooooooth talker. :))